In 2007 I had lasik eye surgery. I was certain that I was done with glasses and it was good thing as in the middle of the night I had to put my clock about 1/2 inch from my eyes.
But, on Tuesday I heard new news. I had been experiencing horrid headaches, episodes of wooziness, and stuggles with my night time driving. I headed to the doctors to make sure it wasn't a tumor ... I can hear Ahnold now ... every body together, "It's not a tumor...."
And it wasn't. It's my ability to shift from long to short vision distances quickly. And it's some elevated levels of fluid in my ears. And it's the strain on my eyes.
As my doctor said, "when we get older we have to get glasses to help us see in short distances." Are you kidding me? So, the day before my 35th birthday, guess who got to go to the grocery store to purchase reading glasses for my computer work.
Back to glasses we go, and realizing that I could actually now purchase glasses for under $200. Bonus?
Saturday, November 6, 2010
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Are you happy?!?
That's the question I got at church this morning. "Are you happy?" right after my new favorite answer to, "How are you?"
"I'm upright, moving, with clothes on -- things are going pretty well!"
My answer wasn't good enough. "No, no, I mean in your job? How is it? Are you happy now?"
Am I happy now? Well, I go to work, I work, I get paid, and I try my best. I'm doing all right.
"Well, do you think this job is part of God's will for you?"
Wait for it -- my head exploded. "I don't believe any of God's children can ever be out of God's will for their life, so yes, I believe this job is part of God's will for me. A long term career, not really sure about that. But it's where God has called me to at this point in my life. So, yes, I think it's part of God's will for my life."
"I suppose, but I really think his will for us is to be happy."
WHAT?!?!? "I find that he wants us to be content not really happy. And ps. your logic doesn't make any sense." (I did mention the logic thing.)
And here's my favorite part: "Well, if you're not happy then you're just miserable."
Can we take a moment to breathe thru the frustration? Ok, we can continue. "I'm sorry, but unhappy doesn't equal miserable."
"Ok, but that's not the way I see it."
With that I grabbed another half donut and went to Sunday School. And vowed to pray for my pastor more.
As I've been pondering this post, I realize I should give some history. My mom had these same statements for us while growing up. When I heard them again my brain started reeling.
And I should have pointed my friend at church to the cross: God's will for us is to realize our need of him and that he provides a way to know him thru Jesus. That need exists at the start, middle and end of our relationship with Jesus. In the frustration, confusion, uncertainty, excitement, pain, sorrow, and all other things that might make us question God's involvement in our lives.
It's true - I don't think we can ever be out of God's will as a Christ follower. Could it seem as though we are? Sure. But then we must see the whole picture as God does, and we realize we are right where He wants us to be. That's good news.
Next week, asking God to show up -- isn't he always showing up? And aren't our eyes often closed that we miss him?
"I'm upright, moving, with clothes on -- things are going pretty well!"
My answer wasn't good enough. "No, no, I mean in your job? How is it? Are you happy now?"
Am I happy now? Well, I go to work, I work, I get paid, and I try my best. I'm doing all right.
"Well, do you think this job is part of God's will for you?"
Wait for it -- my head exploded. "I don't believe any of God's children can ever be out of God's will for their life, so yes, I believe this job is part of God's will for me. A long term career, not really sure about that. But it's where God has called me to at this point in my life. So, yes, I think it's part of God's will for my life."
"I suppose, but I really think his will for us is to be happy."
WHAT?!?!? "I find that he wants us to be content not really happy. And ps. your logic doesn't make any sense." (I did mention the logic thing.)
And here's my favorite part: "Well, if you're not happy then you're just miserable."
Can we take a moment to breathe thru the frustration? Ok, we can continue. "I'm sorry, but unhappy doesn't equal miserable."
"Ok, but that's not the way I see it."
With that I grabbed another half donut and went to Sunday School. And vowed to pray for my pastor more.
As I've been pondering this post, I realize I should give some history. My mom had these same statements for us while growing up. When I heard them again my brain started reeling.
And I should have pointed my friend at church to the cross: God's will for us is to realize our need of him and that he provides a way to know him thru Jesus. That need exists at the start, middle and end of our relationship with Jesus. In the frustration, confusion, uncertainty, excitement, pain, sorrow, and all other things that might make us question God's involvement in our lives.
It's true - I don't think we can ever be out of God's will as a Christ follower. Could it seem as though we are? Sure. But then we must see the whole picture as God does, and we realize we are right where He wants us to be. That's good news.
Next week, asking God to show up -- isn't he always showing up? And aren't our eyes often closed that we miss him?
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Or am I just ....
I think this has been a life long struggle --- trying to be connected to many people.
We all know I'm a bit of a Facebook junkie. Not in the games department, but in the posting area. Some of my friends post witty questions. Others post these inward examining quotes. Another proclaims their love for electric gardening tools. Each to their own. I like to make people laugh. So, I generally post something that has made me chuckle. And as Sutton form will have it, it's a little off the wall.
One friend asked me, "How often to do you post on Facebook?" -- a lot, my people need me!
But, the other day I realized that with my cell phone as my main FB interaction, I don't really see when people's birthdays are. I rarely give that shout of cheer to them (mind you, those who read my blog are often those who actually get a bday post - I feel I know you better!) And then I began to notice all the other things that I've been missing: weddings, babies, struggles, hardship. I have to wonder, am I losing my connectivity or am I just .....
What? what is it that drives me to "go away world" and hole up in my own little existence? What urge makes me put that one foot in front of the other almost with blinders on? I don't think it's survival. I think I'm just selfish. Grievously selfish. Selfish to the point where I wonder who I've missed in the jumble of my world. Wondering who's heart has been crushed because of my stupidity or inward focus.
As JPJ always says, "It's not about me, it's about Christ and His Kingdom." And I'm letting It down. My brother would always caution me -- "You don't need 100 friends, just a couple will do." True, but I love have my hand in these different pots of people. The FL's, the MD's, the Ministry, the UF's, the WA's, the RTS', all part of my world at some point in time. But, I'm not as connect to them as I could be. So again, am I just selfish? Am I hurting those who need more than just a hand in a pot? And how much do I need in the pot - from me and them?
ps. FYI - I and 2 sweet friends from my pot made about 20 batches of Rice Krispie treats to create Mickey Head lollipops to dip in chocolate last night. That's right - 194 of those little suckers are waiting for the ravenous masses to descend upon the 2nd Annual Sweets & Songs. They are gonna eat 'em and like it!
We all know I'm a bit of a Facebook junkie. Not in the games department, but in the posting area. Some of my friends post witty questions. Others post these inward examining quotes. Another proclaims their love for electric gardening tools. Each to their own. I like to make people laugh. So, I generally post something that has made me chuckle. And as Sutton form will have it, it's a little off the wall.
One friend asked me, "How often to do you post on Facebook?" -- a lot, my people need me!
But, the other day I realized that with my cell phone as my main FB interaction, I don't really see when people's birthdays are. I rarely give that shout of cheer to them (mind you, those who read my blog are often those who actually get a bday post - I feel I know you better!) And then I began to notice all the other things that I've been missing: weddings, babies, struggles, hardship. I have to wonder, am I losing my connectivity or am I just .....
What? what is it that drives me to "go away world" and hole up in my own little existence? What urge makes me put that one foot in front of the other almost with blinders on? I don't think it's survival. I think I'm just selfish. Grievously selfish. Selfish to the point where I wonder who I've missed in the jumble of my world. Wondering who's heart has been crushed because of my stupidity or inward focus.
As JPJ always says, "It's not about me, it's about Christ and His Kingdom." And I'm letting It down. My brother would always caution me -- "You don't need 100 friends, just a couple will do." True, but I love have my hand in these different pots of people. The FL's, the MD's, the Ministry, the UF's, the WA's, the RTS', all part of my world at some point in time. But, I'm not as connect to them as I could be. So again, am I just selfish? Am I hurting those who need more than just a hand in a pot? And how much do I need in the pot - from me and them?
ps. FYI - I and 2 sweet friends from my pot made about 20 batches of Rice Krispie treats to create Mickey Head lollipops to dip in chocolate last night. That's right - 194 of those little suckers are waiting for the ravenous masses to descend upon the 2nd Annual Sweets & Songs. They are gonna eat 'em and like it!
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